That Awkward Erection When...

Every guy has that moment. It happens to the best of us, me personally. There comes a time in a man's life when he is sitting in class, minding his own business. For some reason, no one knows exactly why it happens to them, the clock strikes midnight. And not just the little one you get here or there. I mean the definition of erection. There is a difference between the two words by the way if you didn't know. Of course when this happens you begin to become the most paranoid human being ever to walk the earth.

The thoughts rush like blood to your head, "does someone see", "what should I do?", "do I tuck?". This is normal for males to have this belief system, but it still gets worse. The act of trying to hide this secret from the rest of the class gets your adrenaline pumping. This has now turned into an event. Some people are so good at hiding it that they should make this into an olympic event.

You have a few enemies though. Occasionally if a guy peeks over and sees he won't say anything (he knows what you're going through). But if a girl, or god forbid the teacher catches you... No one lives to speak of what happens to the guy. Poor fellow, just trying to learn some algebra when BOOM! he goes from a little cub into a freaking lion king. I think that's what the movie was about.

Once you tuck though your safe. But even worse then sitting down, is when you have to get up. You feel as if everyone in the class is staring at you, watching your every step and eyeing you down. Luckily,  most people don't get caught in this phase because they are smart enough to stay in their seat. If one is called up to the front of the class, its like farting in class when its really quiet and everyone knows it was you. No one is going to call you out on it, but everyone knows that it happened and in a matter of seconds after class is let out, you are the talk of the town.

So my fellow males, try to avoid these confrontations with the opposite sex for they do not know what we deal with. If anyone is suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder due to such an event please contact me immediately as an interview would be nice. For everyone else, good luck there in this world that we call life. Because you never know when you might strike midnight.

Follow me @jbrills27